My dad hasn't gotten rid of much of my mom's since her death in 2019 except clothes (which took two years before he parted with those). I have a few things, but when I ask about getting rid of other stuff, Dad asks, "Why?" It will be a long, hard cleaning out period when he goes.
That's what my dad's trying to avoid for me and my brother. When his own mother/my grandmother died in 1985, it took my parents and my aunt and uncle about six months of weekends (all day, both days) to clear out her house. She'd lived through the Depression and had instinctively kept everything.
I've tried to say the same "Why?" to my dad but in reverse. Why does he feel he needs to clear out so much? Partly due to Grammy's hoarding issues. Partly due to my mom's neat-freak ways, since she ruled the roost in terms of how everything was done. I think he rushed to part with things since he subconsciously thought she'd approve of how he's handling his life. He never expected to outlive her, and he's felt a little overwhelmed by having to manage everything without her. Frankly, I wish I was half as organized as he's been in the past year and a half!
My dad hasn't gotten rid of much of my mom's since her death in 2019 except clothes (which took two years before he parted with those). I have a few things, but when I ask about getting rid of other stuff, Dad asks, "Why?" It will be a long, hard cleaning out period when he goes.
That's what my dad's trying to avoid for me and my brother. When his own mother/my grandmother died in 1985, it took my parents and my aunt and uncle about six months of weekends (all day, both days) to clear out her house. She'd lived through the Depression and had instinctively kept everything.
I've tried to say the same "Why?" to my dad but in reverse. Why does he feel he needs to clear out so much? Partly due to Grammy's hoarding issues. Partly due to my mom's neat-freak ways, since she ruled the roost in terms of how everything was done. I think he rushed to part with things since he subconsciously thought she'd approve of how he's handling his life. He never expected to outlive her, and he's felt a little overwhelmed by having to manage everything without her. Frankly, I wish I was half as organized as he's been in the past year and a half!
Sounds like we both would like our dads to be somewhere in the middle!